What is this Torah that you Speak of?

It never fails.

You can start a clock by it.

Question the present day Yeshivish/Kollel lifestyle and you will get blasted-personally attacked. Be called an idiot and a know nothing-anti-Torah.

This is the way it works with the Jews of the 21st century.

Suffice it to say there are two camps. One camp believes that the current yeshiva structure of today is the way to go. This camp believes in the study of Torah, living a Torah lifestyle, with Torah, Avodah, and Gemilos Chasadim. However, they also are subjecting our naive, idealistic, children to a life of struggle and poverty and listening intently for the next restrictive edict from a Rabbinical leadership starving to hang on to it's power. Not so much because they believe it's the way to go, but because that's just the way it is done.

The second camp believes in Torah, Avodah, and Gemilos Chasadim. They believe in a Torah lifestyle. They do not believe in the canard of modern orthodoxy as it's defined by the far left wing on that spectrum, just as they reject the leanings of the far right wing in the yeshiva structure. They just long to be Torah Jews who service Hashem out of love and call out the evil of all who have other agendas.

I myself am lost. I like to think I am in the second camp, but unfortunately, there are not many people there with me. I used to believe in the infallibility of Rabbinical leadership. Those days are gone now. I have witnessed too much. I get a chuckle out of seeing advertisements for a camp where, under the picture of each Rabbi involved, is a caption like Adom Godol or Talmud Chacham. I turn the page and see pictures of more Rabbis who USED TO BE WITH THE others from the previous page, but are now on their own in a new camp, due to a fight between the groups. I used to think that someone earned the name Gadol Ba'Torah-I didn't think you got invited to become one.

Interestingly enough, talk to any Rabbi nowadays, and he'll tell you that we are definitely at the end of days, all the while wanting us to ignore that at the end of days, the Talmud says, the rabbis will be like a pig with a golden ring in it's snout, as if to say check out my Torah and how much I know. The rest of you know nothing.

I believe the study of Torah is a beautiful and spiritual pursuit. I also believe like Abaye, Ravina, Rava, Rambam, Rav Ashi And Rav Shmuel before me that MY NUMBER ONE JOB AS A TORAH TRUE JEW, IS TO FEED MY FAMILY. For support on this issue, I find solace in the Gemmorah Kesubos around 40 blatt in as well as hilchos Talmud Torah from the Rambam, 3rd perek, where he states that a person should find a job, find a house, find a wife. WHAT? The Rambam said that? Doesn't he understand how hard it is in this society? Like living in Egypt was a day at the beach. Today we do the exact opposite. Find a wife, find a house find a job. I'm amused by Kollel and Bais Medrash students who constantly quote the Rambam, but seem to ignore his prescription for life.

I'm told now that a young man needs to learn longer in this brutal society to get a foundation for life. I do not disagree. Here is my answer to fix all of it. Learn to your hearts content if that is how your parents have raised you, but do not involve our daughters and grandchildren in your selfishness. Let me be very clear. It is extremely selfish to demand of one's parents and in-laws that you be supported. It is extremely selfish to demand of your wife, that she supports you for x number of years and after that you'll see where you are at. Yes, the study of Torah is very important. IF YOU BELIEVE IN IT SO MUCH, DO SOMETHING SELFLESS AND WAIT TO GET MARRIED UNTIL YOU ARE READY TO SUPPORT A WIFE AS THE TORAH AND TALMUD SAYS.

It used to be in years past when a boy was in yeshiva his rebbe would quote him that a person who is kovayah iitim l'Torah is like a person who learned all day. The Rebbe assumed that the boy would follow in the footsteps of his Jewish ancestors. Today they are told that a person can't really be Koveah iitim because he would have to do it the same time each day blah blah blah...What are we doing?? When will this stupidity end??

I wish I could learn Torah all day. There is nothing better for a man to do. I cannot. The Torah commands me to feed my children and take care of my wife and that is what I must do. In the meantime, I will continue to learn at least a daf a day in Bavli and dabble in Yerushalmi, as I have for the last 10 years and find my peace in that. While I understand that the Yeshiva world looks down upon Daf Yomi, I will live with their ridicule and their arrogance. In the meantime, I will do my best to make sure we straighten out the lives of the starry eyed youth who have bought into this broken and dangerous system and hope and pray that I don't get a knock on my door in 22 years from now because my relatives don't have enough money to pay for the first of the ten childrens' wedding. Habait M'shmayim oraeeyh....